Stalled? Change one thing

images (44)Stalled, stuck, and procrastinating? Take heart, there is always a new day. There is always a new door to try. We, humans, want to be our better selves, we really do, but sometimes we get in our own way. Or we are just too comfy to let go of the old patterns. Or, like shiny things, everything else grabs our attention.

One mom told me she would like to stay home in her pajamas for the next month or so. She is happy to cook (she finds it relaxing) and take care of the family, including their multiple four-leggeds, but she really does not want to do much else…like get dressed, leave the house, or go to work. She’s happy to putter around the house and command Action Central from her kitchen table. She knows her protracted pajama party at home is not realistic and this mom is mad at herself for not wanting to power through her unrelenting to-do list and take that yoga class, call that friend, clean out the basement, or simply get the laundry off the dining room table.

This mom would do well with some regular naps, radical self-care, and boundary-setting to help her regain her inner stamina and strength. However, until she is ready to entertain those suggestions, there is another solution. It’s a great first step towards reclaiming your life: simply, change one thing.

That’s right, pick one – and only one thing – you would like to change in your life. Perhaps you want to read 20 minutes in the morning; power down your electronics an hour before bed; eat more veggies; walk the dog, meditate for ten minutes, balance your checkbook, go to the gym twice a week, or listen, really listen, to your loved ones.

Take a moment to think of how this change will benefit you. Will you find peace of mind, satisfaction, a sense of accomplishment, relief, or, possibly, happiness?

Is now the time to commit to yourself? This is the hard part of this change process. It is usually easier to keep our promises and commitments to our family, friends, and employers. We often slide with our own self-made promises. We will get to it tomorrow, next month, or later. And there is a high probability that “later” never comes.

One Change requires a day-to-day commitment to your chosen action. Try it faithfully for 30 days and see how you feel. Not only will you be happy that you dedicated 30 days to your chosen endeavor; you will have built up some serious will power, and started yourself on a runway of success.  One change at a time; one month at a time.

It’s doable. Are you ready?

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2 Responses to Stalled? Change one thing

  1. Adele Ryan McDowell July 29, 2014 at 12:04 pm #

    Oh Na’ama, you were going for the BIG change, the ultimate change. And it is so necessary in these crazy crazy days of war, rage, violence, and aggression. You are a force and a power of example. And I will certainly take a page from your book. These priorities are totally necessary now. I’m with you. Much love

  2. Na'ama Yehuda July 29, 2014 at 10:23 am #

    Ah, Dear Adele,
    Can you imagine how the world would change if each person committed to that One Change being to operate from kindness rather than aggression to control?
    If that One Change was about raising the frequency of our interactions, having compassion to our fellow passengers on this planet hurling twirling spinning through deep space, to treat the children–our futures, ourselves–with sensitivity and real care?
    Can you imagine?
    How the world would Change?

    My own One Change has been–forced by circumstances, maybe, and heartbreak over war and terror–to try and send compassion over hate.

    Practically speaking, it is keep from getting drawn into generalizations and name-calling and not feed into hate or justifications. It is to try to point out truth and misinformation and do so without righteousness. It is to offer facts without getting (too) attached to whether they persuade. It is to see the individuals in the mass of misery and not diminish one life for another. It is to have my heart break for those used as human shields, caught between political gain and apathy. It is to send kindness to all those caught in aggressive tugs-of-rope, not just in wars between People, but in domestic wars of violence and rage, as well. It is to offer love and attention to my loved ones, who are so many of them deep in worry, loss, and life under rocket fire. To try and send compassion over hate. To remember that compassion also means to care for me, so others have less worry. To do what I can.

    So far, it is a pretty full time job. Everything else gets done in the backdrop of this mission. Priorities.

    I think that mama should take a week-in-pajama staycation. Get the kids in on the deal. Build forts. Roast watermelon seeds. String ziti chains all over the living room. Do jumping jack competitions, airplanes, piggy back rides. Celebrate safety–enough food, good shelter, quiet nights. Sounds perfectly reasonable to me.

    May the One Change bring less pain, less hate, more care, more light.